


Pygmalion

by ThereforeIAmAPipsqueak



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Merpeople, F/M, Merman Kylo Ren, Possessive Kylo Ren, underwater road trip
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:33:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23770066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThereforeIAmAPipsqueak/pseuds/ThereforeIAmAPipsqueak
Summary: "The Jakkuvian Emporium of Marine Aquaculture and Agriculture had a mermaid, or so the posters plastered across every available surface of the small, dusty town proclaimed..."Rey, an aspiring marine biologist, has waited her whole life to see a mermaid. And when the aquarium she works at finally manages to secure funding for one it seems like a dream come true.Kylo is not what she imagined however. Moody, sullen and the biggest pain in the ass she can imagine, he seems more work than he's worth. But when Rey catches a glimpse of a mysterious stranger by his tank one night, her quiet everyday life is suddenly upended and she finds herself dragged into the cross fire between two worlds trapped beneath thousands of years of secrets.Of which she, herself, is merely one.
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Phasma, Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 31
Kudos: 60





	Pygmalion

**Author's Note:**

> Uhhh yeah so this is just really a case of me writing a fic I've always wanted to read. Gives me something to do to not go mad during quarantine. Tags will be updated as I go because I don't even fully know where this bad boy is going.
> 
> Edit2: if you've subscribed and you just got a notification update. It's just because I've posted an edited version of the first chapter :) fixed up some of the punctuation and grammar issues (and the fact the story seemed to be pasted twice??).

The Jakkuvian Emporium of Marine Aquaculture and Agriculture had a mermaid, or so the posters plastered across every available surface of the small, dusty town proclaimed. High angled cheek bones, with delicate frills at the ears and large, gormless eyes peered up innocently from between the heavily embossed, and slightly glowing letters of the poster. Fingers crooked as if begging the viewer to come see them, these wonderful mermaids, with the artists slight, subtle suggestiveness of the mermaids grin being completely outweighed by the way one mermaid cupped her breast in a manner that not even children would miss. They were garish things really, as far as Rey was concerned, highly stylised, and sexualised in a way that mermaids hadn't been in years, but in the way that Plutt still insisted on marketing them to the public. 

Rey sucks on her teeth as she stares at one such poster, astounded how still, after all the arguing, scrimping and saving they'd been doing over the years to just keep the damn aquarium going, that Plutt had still forked out as many units as he had for the crapped, pretty drawings that looked nothing like what the actual mermaid would look like. Even without having seen the mermaid herself (yet), she'd seen enough anatomical drawings of them in textbooks, caught glimpses of them in the flashing, crackles of the holo screen in the staff room and read every bit of media on them she could find to know that they're nothing like these terribly frilled, innocent faced fish things. 

For one, she knows that they're predators. Sharp toothed and darked eyed, with dappled skin meant for camouflaging amongst the sandy, cool beds of the ocean. Where they'd wait, patiently, poisoned spikes jutting from knobbed spines and taloned fingers itching to render flesh from bone like a flame through coloured plastic. Messy, pungent and yet for some, breathtakingly beautiful. 

Something the candy cane striped monstrosities Platt had plastered through town would never be able to do Rey sneers with a curl of her lip, resisting the urge to spit a wad of tobacco on the posters glossy surface. 

She's standing in the loading dock with the rest of the skeleton crew that makes up the team of JEMA3 (as the locals called it), her overalls already beginning to stick to her skin from the humidity - regardless of the early morning hour. 

Somewhere to her left Jaina and Jacen are playing dice, the hollow rattling of the cup and the muttered curses from Jaina a peaceful distraction in the back of Rey's mind as she feels her temper growing. The three of them had already been at the docks for well over two hours. Rey herself having gotten there an hour prior even to that to re-check the pH and dissolved oxygen of the tanks and retie the rigging of the stretcher. Which had, of course, been done wrong (again), because God forbid any of the night crew follow protocols when setting up equipment. And yet, still, even after all of that (and a couple of soggy baggles the twins had brought), Plutt was nowhere to be seen. She'd seen Dr Phasma roll into Plutt's office around the same time the twins had gotten there, the chemoxenologist disappearing up the steps into her office with a slammed door and a brief nod of greeting. Even now Rey could feel the good Dr's eyes boring into them from where the large frosted glass of Plutt's office over looks the delivery zone, her frustration Rey has no doubt, just as hot as her own. 

The specimen they were bringing in was a nocturnal creature, suited to the deep sea's of the Alderaan events much more than the scorching suns of the Jakkuvian dessert. Hence the initial plan to get the delivery at 4am to give them enough time to get it inside and settled in the new tank before sunrise to cause as little stress to the animal as possible. Plutt hadn't seemed too fussed about any such nonsense as causing the mermaid stress when she'd reminded him about the drop off last night, which by all means, she was fine with. Let him stay in bed till noon, hungover like a sailor he liked to pretend he had once been and out of her hair well she got everything sorted. It would make her life so much easier than having to listen to him bitch about the early morning.

But knowing her adoptive father, and knowing his need to always have his giant bloody nose in everyone's business, Rey has a pretty good idea of what it is he's done. 

And when Plutt eventually rocks up, a good three hours after the agreed meeting time Rey doesn't know whether to be proud of herself or disgusted with him enough to find that she's right. The twins hastily shove their dice and small pile of credits into their pockets as they notice their boss amble along the planking toward them, his overalls hanging loosely around his waist and a half drunk flask of something thick and green in his left hand. 

"Alright?" He says around the plastic straw he's chewing, eyeing the twins distrustfully for a moment. No doubt trying to figure if the two of them have enough in their pockets to warrant the bag and pocket checks at the end of shifts that he only remembered when he knew it was worth his while. 

"No" Rey says before he can fully turn away from them, "No everything is not alright! We were supposed to have our mermaid delivered three hours ago!" 

Plutt casts her a glance she'd long gotten used to under his care, that amused, condescending half smile that just screamed, 'Well aren't you the cutest little thing' whenever she tried to make her opinion known about anything. "There was a slight change of plans." 

Rey folds her arms over her chest, clenching her nails into the flesh of her arm to stop herself from doing anything stupid, and sourly says, "That must have been one hell of a change of plans."

Plutt shrugs as if wasting three hours of his employee's time is a minor inconvenience, "What can I say? Southerners. That's what happens when you trust their lot. Can't be trusted to do anything right." 

Rey can see the twins stiffen from where the two of them have moved to stand stiffly at the end of the dock, their lips curled and Jaina grinding her teeth. They all knew Plutt knew damn well that the two of them were as Southern as it came, the scarring across both their brows and chins diminishing any doubt anyone may have had of the twins heritage. Rey wasn't close enough to either of them to know what had driven them east to their dessert, but even she isn't blind to the faith and patriotism they hold for the family they've left behind. Whatever it was that had caused them to leave had left a wound in its place, and Plutt took any opportunity he could to pick, and prod at it till it festered and oozed and either one, or both, of the twins had to excuse themselves before they got fired. 

He'd always been a bastard like that, even when Rey had been a child, and his way of making her feel welcome to the aquarium had been an hour long lecture on why he hated kids. 

Before Rey can do more than open her mouth to pointedly ask him what he's done a horn blares from the alley that leads to the docks from the main road. The grinding of dirt and hum of engines following soon after. 

As one the four of them turn to look at the truck squeezing its way through the narrow drive towards them- like a giant red rat squeezing through a bathroom pipe. 

That’s not an entirely fair comparison Rey knows, but the truck trundling towards them is an old, patchwork thing of parts and pieces. The hood slanted down to a point in old Alderaan style that supposedly made it more aerodynamic, but just made it look like a rat in Rey's opinion. 

"Well alright team! Look whoese finally arrived!" Plutt says as if he's the one whoese been waiting three hours, suddenly taking charge of the operation now that all the hard work is done. "Now I don't want any complains, this will be a joint effort. Think of all the m-education this creature is going to bring to our little town!". All of them can hear the slight stutter Plutt gives as he just barely stops himself from saying money. 

Rey is already moving to get the sling and crane from the back before Plutt has finished his little speech, no doubt in her mind that Plutt will leave the hard lifting to them as he postures and preens and claims the paperwork took forever well they get the mermaid in her tank. 

The closing of Plutts fist around her arm quickly dismisses that idea and Rey casts him a quizzical look as he smiles down at her, "How about you get that paperwork for me dove? I'll get the rigging and these lazy arses started for the day. " 

Those lazy arses had been started for the day a lot earlier then he had Rey stops herself from pointing out, just nodding her head and changing her course to stomp towards where the driver is standing. He's looking directly at her as she approaches, a clip board held loosely in his arms and (Rey winces when she see's it), a dark glare firmly fixed on his face. 

"The creature is a nocturnal one" the driver says in lieu of a greeting as Rey takes the data pad from him, barely hiding her grimace as she's faced with the full force of his frustration. 

"I know" Rey says as she signs the aquariums data code at the bottom of the page and flicks through the disclaimer pages, her eyes briefly resting on the, 'Company holds no responsibility for any damage that may occur to packages due to orders or instructions obtained from the receiving party' with a scowl. Knowing their luck Plutt's decision has probably lead to their mermaid boiling alive or some such horrible fate with the delay. She'd have to check with Phasma again on how much of an impact external heat had on changing the waters dissolved oxygen concentration with a specimen already in it. She imagined it would be a faster change to depletion, but she hadn't really started studying much about the relationship of mermaid homeostasis in ecosystems so she would have to check that part at least. 

"We don't appreciate having plans changed like that at the last minute," The driver continues, eyeing Rey from behind his large bottlecap glasses. Rey's frustration flares again as the driver confirms her suspicions that yes, Plutt had indeed changed the delivery time on them at the last moment. 

"I know" Rey says again, a little less sympathetic this time even as she slips him an extra few credits for his troubles. Or to keep him quiet. She's not fully sure yet the entire extent of Plutt's damage, but from the quiet exclamations from the twins near the end of the truck she's willing to bet it's not too bad. But better safe than sorry she reckons. They'd rather not have protestors and governing representatives swarming their doors after the last scandal. No one had died or even gotten hurt that last time but it had still taken them months to fully coax the public back to the centre. It was a kind of hell Rey would appreciate not having to deal with again. 

The mans' lips thin even more when he's faced with Rey's seemingly blasé attitude, but as it is she's barely managing to keep her panic and frustration at bay as she catches sight of the loading time of the mermaid into the truck. 

"Now do you know how to properly transfer this thing into it's tank or will you be needing me to stick around and help out at all?" The man says as he takes the datapad back from Rey, eye's scanning it over to ensure it's been signed for and that Rey's pressed her wrist into the payment chip long enough for the delivery fee to have gone through. 

Rey folds her arms over her chest and raises an eyebrow at him as she considers his offer, "Cost us extra would it?"

If anything Rey's question seems to irritate the man even more, his lips pressing down into a deeper scowl and his eyebrows disappearing behind the frame of his glasses.

"But of course. Why would it be anything different?" He almost sounds sardonic as he says it, eyes flicking towards the aquarium with a scowl. 

"Nah think we'll be fine then. Thanks for the offer."   
  
Before the man can start up with another lecture or splutter more than an , "are you absolutely sure-" Rey is waving him off over her shoulder and moving in the direction Plutt and the twins had hurriedly wheeled the mermaid. 

She's greeted by the sight of Jaina being slapped in the face with the edge of an absolutely huge, dappered tail before she's even crossed the threshold. The younger woman reels back with a swear, the rigging she'd been holding to secure the stretcher slipping through her hands with a muted schhkkk. Rey lunges forwards and grabs the rigging before the stretcher can become fully vertical, her hands smarting as the rope pulls at them. 

"He was moving too fast" Jaina murmurs to Rey out the corner of her mouth as she helps to re-stabilise the stretcher, throwing a glare to where Plutt sits behind the wheel of a small crane. From this close Rey can see that Jaina's cheek is a now a bright red and her overall are streaked red from where she'd quickly wiped her hands. Rey's had enough experience to know that that’s definitely going to be bruised by midmorning. 

"I can hold this if you want," Rey mutters back to her, ignoring Plutts yell of, "What's the hold-up down there?" from where he hangs out the door of the crane and stares down at the two of them. 

"It’s fine," Jaine mutters, her tone cold as she takes the rigging rope back from Rey and Rey's dismayed that she seems to have insulted the younger woman somehow. She nods her understanding, checking once again to make sure that Jaina's stance is strong enough and that the rigging and stretcher are secure. Because it's her job no matter how much she'd prefer to not further rub salt into Jaina's wounds. 

Satisfied that everything is as secure as it can be with the way the mermaid is thrashing and yowling at them, Rey turns to catch her first glimpse of their newest addition. Excitement fizzing in her stomach. Finally. Finally she's going to be able to see her first ever mermaid up close. 

What Rey see's when she finally manages to get a good look at their delivery over the tarped lining of the stretcher however has her freezing in place with horror, the blood draining from her face. 

"I thought you said we were getting a mermaid!" Rey yells up at Plutt over the rattling of the rigging. Plutt throws her a disgusted look, eyebrows shooting up in condescension as he mockingly indicates the thrashing mass before him with a tilt of his head. 

"Whaddya call that bonehead?! A bloody teddy bear?" 

For a moment Rey's too furious to even speak, hands shaking at she shoves her rope over at Jacen to hold. The man scrambles to redistribute his weight once he's got the new ropes in his hand, leaning back with all his strength in an attempt to keep the rigging stable. 

"I call that a fucking merman Plutt!" Rey hollers as she grabs a bag of Calcium Peroxide tablets and legs it up the climbing rail towards the tank, "a very expensive fucking merman that you're going to god damn kill if you put it into that tank!" 

"What nonsense are you dribbling?" Plutt sneers as he watches Rey rip open the bag with a box cutter and tips it over the lip of the tank, dragging it in a slow, trickling circle around the top as she tries to distribute the chemicals correctly. 

"What the hell are you doing girl??!! My mermaids definitely going to die if you kept doing whatever the hell it is your doing!" 

"Jaina!" Rey hollers to the younger twin, electing to ignore Plutt's demands in favour of doing his bloody job instead, "Go get all the towels from the back. As many as you can! I need you to soak them in his old tank water and get them on his tail! For the love of my sanity keep him wet! I need to drain his tank" 

Jaina is moving before Rey has fully completed her sentence, tying her rope in a quick release knot around the nearest column and just about sprinting through the network of tank pipes and monitors to the break room. 

"She would be wet if you just moved out the bloody way!" Plutt roars, face beginning to go red with anger as Rey grabs a thermometer and shoves it into the water. 

"He will experience a slow asphyxiation due to low oxygen levels and die if I move out the bloody way" Rey finally yells at Plutt, hands clenched around the top rail of the climbing scaffolding as she turns and snarls down at him "Males are unable to live at the same altitude as the females. He needs a higher dissolved oxygen content then the tank currently has and putting him in it will murder him! He's not designed to live with as little oxygen as the females do!" 

"For the love of God," Plutt bellows, "A mermaid dying from water. NOW I've heard everything. " 

Feeling the last strands of her temper snap Rey grabs the radio from her belt, thumbing the frequency to Phasma's channel and pressing down the PTT button in a scream of static. 

"Hey Doc, can you please get down here and explain the differences to Plutt between a boy and a girl" Rey snarls into the receiver around a mouth full of plastic piping as she tries to get the pump working, " Because it seems to be a concept he's struggling with today". Whatever Phasma's says in response is cut off by Rey's hacking as the murky, salty water from the merman's old tank gushes into her mouth. Wiping her mouth in disgust on the shoulder of her overalls Rey shoves the pipe back into the new tank, trying her best to ignore the screeching of the merman and the thudding of the rigging against the floor as he tries to twist himself away from the twins and the towels. 

She can see the twins struggling to lower the stretcher down enough for them to fully cover him with the towels, the fabric being snatched and ripped from their hands as their merman tries to get them to back up. His sedatives are starting to wear off Rey realises with a jolt. His sleepy yowling from before has turned into a warbling scream that grates against her eardrums, making her feel a bit dizzy as the vibrations attempt to disrupt her point of balance. If this had been any other time, and she'd been in any other place Rey would have taken a movement to stop and marvel at the art of evolution. Of how such a vaguely irritating (if not slightly nauseating) sound above water could become such a deadly hunting techniqe below. One single warble of his with her head under the water and Rey would be as lost as and disorientated as a virgin at an orgy. She'd be dead within five minutes if he was hungry. She'd maybe last an hour if he wasn't. 

"REY! He's starting to break the stretcher!" Jacen yells up at her, a moment before a loud thud takes to the air. Rey snaps her head around to find that the merman has managed to tip himself off the stretcher and is trying desperately to claw his way to Jacen. He's still groggy and disorientated from the transport sedative so his movements are awkward and stilted. He moves carefully, testing the ground in front of him as if he's not quite sure if the movement of the hand in front of him is his own, or an illusion. 

"Back up!" Plutt yells, causing the merman to twist around to look in his direction with a snarl instead. From her position above them Rey can see the way Plutt swallows as he's faced with the full force of a merman's ire. He's managed to back himself up between two palette's of boxes, not realising how the netting has become a tripping hazard where its hooked around his feet during his mad dash back. Before Rey can shout out a warning the merman throws himself forward, the black spined fin on his back rising in a sharp crest and his claws embedding in the concrete floor near Plutts boot. Plutt jerks on reflex, screaming in shock when he topples backward as his feet stay rooted underneath the netting but his torso bows backwards without its support. 

Rey's already halfway down the ladder before he fully hits the ground. 

Jaina stops her and shoves her back up it with a yelled, "Get back up there!" as she skids past and positions herself to the left of the merman. In a flurry of movement too fast for Rey to fully follow Jaine hurls a rope under the merman's belly and another diagonal across his back. Against all odds Jacen somehow manages to catch both on the other side at the same time and twists them, throwing them back in opposite positions to his sister. Then in a perfectly synchronised moves that speaks of years of practise, the twins turn to face the wall and lunge.

The ropes cinch tight instantly, snapping the mermans arms to his chest and out from underneath him and flattening his fins to his back in one movement. His chin smashes against the ground with a roar that vibrates through the room. Plutt takes the opportunity to rip the netting from his legs and throw himself up onto one of the palettes. Scrambling backwards onto the boxes and towards the stairs that lead to his office as he attempts to put as much room between himself and the merman. 

"Bloody fucking monster! Just it wait till I-UGHHHH" 

The sound of a door slamming open cuts off Plutts tirade and sends him scrambling desperately to not be thrown from his perch on the boxes as Phasma appears. Her face is furious as she takes stock of the scene in front of her, a pair of earbuds dangling around her neck. 

And no doubt it makes quite the scene. The merman has managed to work himself up into a foaming frenzy from where the twins have trussed him up. The rope is firm, pressing corded lines into his skin that warp the scales of his tail. His ears have flared out on either side of his head now, a steady trickle of blue tinted blood dripping along his torso where his talons have opened up a series of cuts as he's tried to disentangle the rope from his form. 

"What the hell is going on here?" Phasma asks in a deceptively calm voice that carries around the room, her foul mood darkening as she hears Plutts' shriek of, "sedate the fucker already!" and notices the towels the twins are desperately trying to throw over the merman. "Why in Stars Orbit was the tank not ready beforehand?!".

This last question she throws across the room to Rey where she's desperately stabbing at a monitor, ignoring the flashing of the lights and the rapidly scrolling text. 

"Because, as I delightfully called you out here to explain, - AH HA!" Rey cut herself off with a crow of delight as the oxygen levels finally settled within the new perimeter's, " Get him back on the stretcher! It should be ok now!". 

Rey hits the concrete floor below the ladder with a thud just as the twins, aided by Phasma and a tiny syringe of strong smelling brown liquid, roll the merman back onto the realigned stretcher. From up close Rey realises that the Merman is slightly smaller than she'd thought. The flattening of his scales and fins against him removing the near monstrous bulk he'd appeared to be sporting from above. He's actually rather lithe Rey realises, red scales stretched tight over corded muscle and a slim figure that clearly marks him at the end of his adolescence. If he hadn't been out of the water for as long as he had Rey may have tried to test her luck to see if she could work out his exact age from his growth scales. As it is however, the crane is already starting to hoist him in the air and whatever sedative Phasma used seems to be barely working. She can nerd out later. 

Rey waits until the merman is fully suspended above the water before she throws the lever to split the stretcher in two along the middle, the risk of putting it in the water with him too great. He'd probably grab onto it and tip the crane into the tank with how aggressive he's been. 

The merman drops into the water with a crash and a slurry of bubble's that turn the tank glass white. 

For a moment it appears as if the world is holding its breath. The rush of blood in Rey's ears as she waits drowns out even the incessant beeping of the tank machinery. Rey is sure they've killed him, they've murdered him and that’s it, that’s fucking it, she's done, she's quitting, she can't anymore- but then with a thud and a massive wave of water over the top of the tank, the merman slams into the glass. 

Rey sags against the controls in relief, smiling despite herself at the happy cheer the twins give in the face of their merman's attempts to break the wall. The sight of the two of them only seem to incite his wrath even more, his talons scraping against the glass as if attempting to get down to the two Southerners below. 

Rey takes a moment to admire the way the light from the water plays against his scales, revealing the reddish undertones peppered along his spinal scales and throughout his tail. She frowns at them, realisng as she does that he must be from the east side of the Alderaan gulf. That’s surely the only way his diet would have had so little carotenoid pigments in it for the red of his tail to be so subdued. She thinks? She'd have to check that book she had again on the impacts of diet on pigment presentation again. As it was they'd already have to edit his diet plan, what was it if they had to add some more carotenoid base feed in. Maybe that would make the patterns on his skin a bit brighter? Or would it just lighten up the entirety of his scal-

Rey is brought from her thoughts as she hears Plutt below her, bellowing for her to get down there now that the immediate danger to their merman is gone. Rey briefly closes her eyes and contemplates just tossing herself into the tank after the merman, but then she hears the twins voices join the frey and knows she needs to go intervene before things get worse than they already are. 

Sliding down the ladder Rey stops as she finds Jaina squaring off against Plutt, her shoulders tight and her mouth downturned. Phasma is standing off to the left, staring out at where the merman is now lazily exploring his tank, her ears red and her lips pursued. Now doubt Rey had missed the tongue lashing she'd given Plutt over the late delivery and treatment of the merman and he was now channelling it at the twins and herself. 

"If you ever pull another stunt like whatever the hell that rope thing was without my say so your both out! I don't care which one of you does it, those restrains were not board certified and are not to be used in MY aquarium! Are we clear??!"

To Jaina's credit she doesn't even flinch under the spray of spittle Plutt lets fly her way in gratitude over saving his life. She just faces him down till he's seemed to work off most of his anger, just offering a nod and a 'yes sir' before she turns and storms off to find her brother when Plutt's attention is diverted to Rey. 

"No," He says in way of greeting, " _No_. That's it. I've had it. Your fired. _Fired_ you hear me! You had one job.ONE.Simple thing to do before my mermaid got here and you couldn't even do that correctly! How hard is it to set up one tank!? You'd better say thank you to the good Doc here for saving your ass because if it wasn't for her we could all very well be dead!" 

Rey crosses her arms over her chest and simply raises an eyebrow. She will definitely be saying thank you to Phasma later, but Plutt doesn't need to know that. Especially not when what she's going to be saying thank you for is most certaintly not for saving his arse. 

"And that I did. The tank was set up for a mermaid this morning," She says cooly, nodding in the tanks direction, "But seeing as our delivery was a merman I feel as if my decision to delay putting him in the tank was one that was completely justified. If it was your intent to kill the newest exhibit however and my decision has stopped that then I'd be more than happy to pack my things and leaves. 

From over Plutts shoulder she see's Phasma look over at her with a raised eyebrow as Plutt starts bellowing at Rey to get her things and get out. Rey, already used to her bosses near daily threats, just barely stops herself from telling him to fuck off as she waits impatiently for Phasma's verdict. "

Your girls right Plutt" Phasma says, ignoring the way Rey's face pulls in disgust at being called Plutt's anything, as she taps her fingers against the glass, "see how the scales near the underbelly slope down into the tail in a v curve? Key morphological structuring of a male. Female's underbellies are more of a half moon curve. You see the darkness of the scales along his chest as well? Female's typically have a lighter, almost pearly - though actually quite interesting enough it has been documented as a dark purple as well of all things-" 

"Would you just bloody get to your point?!" Plutt snarls at Phasma. Any charm or grovelling he may have had for the Doctor long gone in the face of his anger at his ward and his need to drag her down a few pegs.

For a moment Phasma looks affronted, her mouth gaping at his tone and her eyebrows raised in disbelief. But just as quickly as it comes her face calms, lips press together and her nostrils flaring quickly, once, in anger. Even Rey, with her limited knowledge of good old fashioned healthy emotional intelligence, can tell that he has pushed the doctor too far. 

"It doesn't have breast you stupid idiot" she snaps, "There are no mammary glands where there would be if it was a female! I'm aware you would only have a very, very limited experience with the female form but surely even you can tell with that basic, monkey brain of yours that it has no breasts." 

Pluttg red when faced with the doctors wrath. But more horrified at the notion of being swindled than Phasma's insults he twists around and storms up to the tank to observes their tantrumming merman with narrowed eyes. 

"Stop talking bullshit," Plutt snaps, "How can fish have breasts?! They're fish!"

Not for the first time in her life does Rey find herself wondering how the hell Plutt had managed to not only secure his job as a manager at the aquarium, but managed to keep it for as long as he has. Because really, this isn't even the stupidest thing she's heard come out of his mouth over her 15 years at the aquarium. 

"They're mammals Unkar" Phasma forces out from between gritted teeth, looking as if in that very moment she was regretting ever receiving her doctorate and everything else that had brought her up to this moment. Silently Rey sympathised. She felt like that most days when Plutt was involved. 

"They're mammals that carry their young and have specifically evolved to hunt humans. Of course they have breasts!" 

Rey tactfully stops herself from making a point of staring at one of the bright, eye-catching posters Plutt himself had commissioned. The busty candy-caned tailed thing stares back at her mockingly from the wall above Plutt's head. 

"But dolphins don't have breasts," Plutt snarls back, seemingly grasping at straws as he'd faced with the possibility that he may be wrong.

"Dolphins don't exactly eat humans though do they?"

"I'm going to kill him!" Plutt bellows instead of answering Phasma, which Rey is grateful for because she was almost worried for a moment there that he'd turn around and claim that dolphins did infact eat humans.

"How dare he sell me a fucking stud?! How the hell am I supposed to breed this! " 

Rey, who up till that point hadn't know anything about plans to apparently breed their own mermaid population, smartly remains silent. Because not even she is stupid enough to tell him that even if it had been a mermaid Jakkuvian regulations would have forbidden them from keeping any calves in the same tank as the mother, and tank size regulations would have made it impossible to keep the calf in any other tanks at their aquarium. They'd only ever be able to keep the one mer with the way things were going, and unless they ever managed to get more space and expand, that’s the way it would stay. 

No matter how much she absolutely hated the idea of leaving the poor thing alone. 

"And _you!_ " Plutt snarls, turning around to shove a meaty finger back in her face,"Don't think I've forgotten about your attitude girl! Your taking Grondo's night shift for the next month!"

Reys jaw drops in muted fury, "You can't do that! You know I have night classes!"

"Tough shit" Plutt sneers as he storms away from Rey, mockingly waving his hand over his should as he goes. "Guess you'll just have to graduate a year later then all those friends of yours! What a shame" 

"I'll talk to him" Phasma says, as if she really thinks that will help at all. 

It doesn't. 

And to top it all off? Plutt never ends up paying them for the morning. 


End file.
